So, How Was Your Weekend?

Typically, when I come off a family-heavy weekend and land in Monday morning, people ask, "Hey, how was your weekend? Do anything fun?"

This happens to you too, right?

And after one of these very fam-type weekends I usually look at my shoes and say, "Oh, well, nothing really."

I try desperately to come up with something, but saying I made two sets of lunches, gave the girls baths, and cooked a chicken doesn't really make for sparkling conversation.

HOWEVER . . .

This weekend, I didn't so much as do something as I had lots of somethings happen to me.

I fell down the stairs on Saturday morning. That was eventful.

And lucky me, they're HARDWOOD stairs. Miraculously, nothing broke. But the bruises? They make Mr. Encyclopedia Man gasp in horror every time he sees them. I'd post pics but

1. they're mostly on my butt and
2. I can't figure out how I'd take a picture of my own butt.

They look a bit like a gigantic tattoo of a potted rose with many, many leaves.

In order to console myself over my brush with death, we called the babysitter and went out to see Quantum of Solace. We were about twenty minutes into the film when my cell phone started to vibrate.

Can you guess?

No. You can't!

It was the babysitter calling to tell us the goats all got out of their pen and were wandering around the property. Oh, and did I mention one of the does went into heat Saturday morning? The babysitter let me know there were fornicating goats on our front porch . . . and the kids had a few questions.

Lucky me, Mr. Encyclopedia Man keeps his cool in these situations. He said, "We'll find them later. Let's finish the movie and go get sushi."

And so we did. Over dinner, I came up with the theme song to The Love Boat. Just replace it with The Love Goat and you've got an anthem for the breeders. Then Mr. Encyclopedia Man came up with the song Business Time by Flight of the Conchords which you must go watch here (but not in front of children or co-workers). We thought either of these could be broadcast to the goats to help set the mood.

Then we decided that since it looked like we were going to have LOTS of goats come Spring, that we would start taking them as hostest gifts where ever we go. "Hey, thanks so much for having us over for dinner, and here's a baby goat!"

We nearly got ourselves kicked out of the restaurant.

Eventually we worked up the nerve to go home. Mr. Encyclopedia Man shined the headlights of the truck onto the front porch and startled six goats. They tried to come in the house with us. They went to the back deck to try and watch the TV.

Fast forward to the ENTIRE rest of the weekend. Escaping goats everywhere. Dog chasing goats. Children chasing goats. Dog collars and leashes on goats!

I was just about ready to make a goat sacrifice as my lovely critique partner Michele (who is writing a YA book about ancient Greece and the occasional goat sacrifice) has suggested to me.

By late Sunday night, after another goat escape, Mr. Encyclopedia Man figured out the problem and thus far (oh, please, oh, please) they're staying put.

Oh, and I'd have pictures for you but Eldest and her best friend borrowed the digital camera to take pictures of their wood block castle and dropped it. Bye bye camera.